It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
