Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Randomize
