I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Actions speak louder than pants.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
