You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
