Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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