kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I love you.
Bad choice
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