we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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