It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
