Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Randomize