(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
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