Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
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