My first STD was from a foam party
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Randomize
