I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Randomize
