I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
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