He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
