i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
And then he peed in my hair
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