Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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