i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize