Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Randomize
