He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize