How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
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