covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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