i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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