Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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