hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Randomize
