Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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