She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Randomize
