I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
honey bunches of taint.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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