I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
