she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
