You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
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