Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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