But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Who wears a wallet chain?!
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
