sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
