Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
