I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Too much gin, very little bucket
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
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