so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
