Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
where are my eyebrows?
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