weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
is wine microwaveable?
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
Randomize
