The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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