lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
