apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
Randomize
