ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Randomize
