i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
