wat bout pragnant strippers??
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Randomize
