sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
