Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize
