you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
