paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
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