dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Randomize
