So drunk, too bad you don't want this
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
